Acceptance Versus Resignation: Why You Need to Know the Difference

Acceptance Versus Resignation: Why You Need to Know the Difference

 “Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” ~ Lao Tzu.

You might be thinking there is no real difference between acceptance and resignation. You might be thinking, “Aren’t they the same thing?” When in fact they are very different.

Let’s Take a Look at Why

The word resignation is derived from the Old French word resigner. It means to “give up”, “relinquish”, “abandon” or “To give oneself up” to an emotion or situation. 

Resignation is recognising the impossibility of the situation but still wanting it to be different. There is a sense of struggle, powerlessness, and lack of control. This is a stuck place, with no way forward and no way back.

Acceptance on the other hand is about choice. It comes from the word acquiesce (1610-20), the Latin word is acquiescere, “To Find Rest.” Instead of getting caught up in the “if onlys” or feeling like a victim in life, you “choose to let go” of what is beyond your control.

This is a key principle of  ACTAcceptance and Commitment Therapy, which utilises mindfulness skills to help you connect with the present moment, and engage with emotions like gratitude, peace, joy, satisfaction and contentment. You also discover and connect with your values, what matters to you, and take steps towards a future you want.

MOVING TOWARDS ACCEPTANCE 

What you can learn from Bill Murray’s character in Ground Hog Day! Haven’t watched it yet, check out the trailer here.

Bills character keeps waking up to the exact same day, in a town he loathes. This goes on for almost a year, as he tries every conceivable way to change his situation or numb the experience. It was when he came to a place of acceptance that his life began to move forward again. 

Here are three other benefits he experienced and you can too:

♥   More Gratitude – Noticing and appreciating the small things. This might be a piece of music, a crisp winter’s day, the sound of laughter or someone’s kindness.

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. ~ Melody Beattie

♥   Increased Self-knowledge – Reconnecting with inner values you may have forgotten, lost sight of, or were unaware of, and identify what you want based on these values.

Life itself is your teacher, and you are in a state of constant learning. ~ Bruce Lee

♥   Stronger sense of Empathy – Recognising how influential your words and actions are. This can be as simple as a smile, a kind word, or a listening ear to lift and encourage the people you meet in the course of your daily life.

I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. ~ Maya Angelou

 

Adversity is a normal part of the life journey. It is painful at times, but it is also an opportunity for personal growth. There is an old wives saying, “bitter or better”. The former is when life happens to you, the latter is letting go of what is beyond your control, so you can move forward with meaning and purpose again. This is where peace, rest and love reside.

Lets Talk

If you are struggling to come to terms with a difficult event in your life, then please call me for a Free 15 minute consultation. We can talk about what is going on for you and I can answer any questions you might have. If I am with a client I will get back to you as soon as I can.

or if you are ready to book now

Lets Talk

If you are struggling to come to terms with a difficult event in your life, then please call me for a Free 15 minute consultation. We can talk about what is going on for you and I can answer any questions you might have. If I am with a client I will get back to you as soon as I can.

or if you are ready to book now

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